Asking for Help

It is a common stereotype that women refuse to seek help. However the truth is that finding it hard to ask for help is not just a challenge for women but for men as well. It’s also true that it seems many women have additional layers of baggage to clear in relation to this topic. This is because culturally women have been taught from an early age that their role is to be the caregiver and nurturer of the family, often to the cost of their individuality. We don't have to go too far back in history to see that women were considered second class citizens without any individual rights, so asking for help probably was not even in the realm of conscious awareness for most women of a different era.

There have been recent studies in the field of Epigenetics that show many lifetimes of trauma and belief systems are passed down through the generations in the DNA of each individual. From that we can deduce that how women are treated and expect to be treated may in fact be transferred down through generations on a cellular and even an energetic level. 

The question can be taken even further; why do women find it so hard to receive? Why do women feel it’s selfish for their needs to be met? Why do women feel it is part of their “job” to put everyone else first? and so on. The answers to these questions can be traced to societal and generational expectations as stated above but also can be tied to the individual experiences of each woman in her own life. What if asking for help is perceived as making yourself vulnerable? How do you allow yourself to trust someone else when you have learned that when you make yourself vulnerable and/or trust someone else, you have been hurt?

Women are not doomed to never be able to ask for their needs to be met, to never put themselves first on their list, to never learn how to love and nurture themselves. If there is a struggle with it, give yourself permission to ask for help, to clear what is getting in the way and maybe even remind yourself that you cannot give from an empty vessel.

You are worth it!

Published in Natural Awakenings of Fairfield County